Complain about Christmas cards entering the shops far too quickly at the end of late August. The only thing causing more outrage than this is when Valentine’s Day cards start to pile up way before we have even taken down our Christmas Trees.
Then of course we then face the problem of when to actually send the cards which we have reluctantly bought in October. The real reason being, the earlier you send them the more you get back. Harsh. But realistic
The Christmas No.1 I’m just about old enough to remember a time when either an actual Christmas song or something worth listening to won the accolade. These days however, your No.1 is governed by reality TV or those who seek to rebel by supporting the downloads of something hideous.
Sorry Shakin’ Stevens, but a few things have changed since 1985.
One year at the start of November we all make the terrible life time error of deciding to watch a minor celebrity to turn on the Oxford Street Lights. We stand their getting pushed and shoved, potentially whilst it rains whilst not even being able to see ‘the celebrity’ only to be rather disappointed when the lights eventually (behind schedule) come on.
The dilemma of ‘ when is it too soon to put up our decorations?’ Causes a considerable amount of pain mid-November onwards. ‘ When exactly should we buy our tree?’ Of course all tree problems are eradicated if we pull our tree down from the loft – (but we are doing things properly this year remember…) So naturally we must all be prepared to attempt to pot the tree, catch it from falling twice a day and costly be sweeping beneath it.. – of course this is all before it eventually dries up and collapses on the 24th
As the big day is now quickly approaching we all find ourselves reading and watching news ‘ IT’S GOING TO BE A WHITE CHRISTMAS!’ – Lies. And yet every year we believe this fantasy we have been fed. Every year we are disappointed. To be honest, I can’t even remember the last time it even snowed in December, let alone on the big day itself.
The Work Christmas Party. Naturally a mid-week event which asks for trouble before we’ve even started. Still a nice opportunity to speak to people we have all walked passed and ignored for four months. This all goes hand in hand with cheap Rose brought in in bulk, which after several glasses highlights a lot of demons we had all previously wished not to show. Namely, you’re an alcoholic, you’re a terrible singer and your favourite plant is mistletoe. – Now giving you a real reason to ignore that guy from HR as you hug the toilet the day after.
Alongside cards comes presents. Family and close friends are hard enough but pair that up with a colleague that suggests that we all participate in Secret Santa …. Naturally we get the one person that we really didn’t want (remember the office Christmas party last year). And with a stupidly low budget we find ourselves wondering around Primark on a Sunday evening buying a three pack of novelty socks.
Growing up watching films like Home Alone and The Grinch have given all of us here in the UK the hope that about twenty extra family members will pop up out of the blue and create the most magical family Christmas. V’s the reality of sitting in your lounge with your mum and Grandad fast asleep, your Dad trying to put together some sort of Christmas leftovers sandwich whist you sit there alone, half way through your third bottle of prosecco.
And so onto the dinner. For some reason at Christmas we put ourselves through the agony of cooking up some dry old fat chicken (aka a turkey) whilst we accompany it with horrendous portions of the world’s worst vegetable and liquefied bread. Mmmm. Lucky enough we have left overs to feed a family of ten for the next two weeks….
What happens next ? Once Christmas is done and dusted we have just one more night to contend with. That is of course the overpriced, overhyped and quite frankly the spectacular disaster that is New Year’s Eve. Where we not only spend the six days in between worrying about where and who with we plan on spending the last moments of the year with. In reality we should all probably be concerned wit how we plan on nursing our hangovers on the 1st
By Kate from Kate Victoria Photography
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